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Looking close in the mirror the other day,
I noticed a few of my hairs have turned gray.
And over-night more laughter lines
I’m looking much older; I’ve got all the signs!
Rough elbow patches, my boobs are sagging,
Repeating myself, nonsensical nagging.
My memory now as good as a sieve,
Will I get much worse for as long as I live?
Full of wax an catarrh inside my ears,
Make most conversations muffled, unclear.
Books and papers with bold black print
Are now all read with both eyes squint!
Most weekends are met with a welcome rest,
Most mornings I wake and gone is my zest.
Early to bed, late to rise –
Trying to rid the bags under my eyes!
Now all the housework takes a long time
It’s an effort to peg washing on the clothesline
It’s not ‘coz I’m lazy – that just isn’t true
Now that I’m older, it takes ages to do!
Even oil is added to regular baths
To stop dry skin spreading, boy what a laugh!
I forget to remember important dates
And always-running one hour late!
Touch y toes in a bid to be trimmer –
It won’t be long before it’s done in my zimmer!
(To squeeze into this I’ve got to be thinner
So now I’ve become a regular slimmer!)
I’ve tried all anti-ageing stuff money can buy,
From pills to creams and mudpacks, I sigh.
Cucumber and teabags to help my complexion,
But they haven’t improved that mirrored reflection!
My knees click more as the years have rolled on
And all-night parties have now long gone.
I cherish most of my evening with books or T.V.,
And get somebody else to make me some tea!
Linda Lawrence
30th September 1994